Lamar left a piece of herself with everyone she met.
She had a gentle hand, a smile, a way of touching people so they will never forget her. Below is a collection of stories from friends, some close, some who just knew her in passing, all powerful.
From the Lamar Project Facebook Fan Page:
My name is Whitney Freeman, and I am a freshman at the University of Alabama. In high school, Lamar was my very best friend. Because of some issues that occurred, we grew further apart than ever before and eventually were not friends. Although we did not talk and did not hang out anymore, I still thought about her every single day. Selfishly, I thought I would have all the time in the world to mend our friendship and to pick up where we left off. I knew Lamar and I were kindred spirits and that God put her in my life to serve a purpose. When I imagined what my wedding would be like one day, I saw Lamar standing next to me. When I imagined having a family and children, I saw my kids knowing Lamar as “Auntie Lamar.” I never imagined I would never get to see those dreams come true, and I NEVER imagined that I would never get the chance to look Lamar in her face and tell her that she was my best friend, that I’m sorry, that everything would be okay, and that I love her more than she knows. But I did lose that chance. Not only did I lose it, it was ripped away from me. Did I take for granted that she and I would both wakeup in the morning? Yes. Was it my fault to hold a grudge? Absolutely. But would I ever put her life in jeopardy? Never. Better yet, given the chance, would I give my life to save hers? Without thinking twice I would. But that chance was placed in the hands of a boy who did not feel the same.
The purpose of my message, and the reason I am disclosing my personal experience of Lamar and our friendship is this: Your friends, family, children, sisters, brothers, team mates, best friends, worst enemies, whoever, can all fall victim to a person like Heath. The reason I am sending this message is because Lamar was MY best friend, and this REALLY HAPPENED to her. Do not think for one second that situations that Lamar was in cannot happen to you or your loved ones. Be aware of your surroundings and the people who are surrounding you. DO NOT fall away from people because they have taken a different path, a dangerous path, a path that you know is wrong. Take the time to make a detour in your own path and find that person and lead them back in the right direction. Help them. Love them. Support them. You will be glad you did it, I can promise you that much. I am asking you as my friends, my family, or even as a complete stranger, PLEASE never let something like this happen again knowing that there could have been even one second that you could have done something to help someone who couldn’t help themselves. Because I haven’t, and more than likely never will, be able to go through a day where I don’t think to myself “What if?” I’m asking you all to take a stand for what’s right and help those in your life who need you, even if they don’t know they do. Because if I could rewind back to only 3 months ago, I would do many things differently to help my best friend because THAT is what friends are for.
Please send this message to everyone that you know, and continue to spread Lamar’s story. You have no idea how much it warms my heart to see so many people touched by Lamar, and I know now that this was the purpose that God had for her in our lives. We have to continue to uphold her legacy and keep a strong bond between us to help people just like Lamar. I know she is looking down on us right now with that beautiful smile on her face thanking all of you for all that you’ve done. Please keep up the good work!
*HIGH SCHOOL AND COLLEGE STUDENTS: It is important to me and to the Herrings that your parents and family members are aware of this situation. I am now asking you to PLEASE either print this message off, forward it in an email, or let your parents and family members read it off of your computer. Either way, it is CRUCIAL for adults to know the prevailing issues of our community. If you think your parents will be upset by this information or you are afraid to disclose it with them, just remember Lamar and know that it is very important for as many people as possible (especially parents and adults) to realize how easy this can happen. If for any reason you don’t want to show them this message on your own, please respond in a message to my personal Facebook your parent’s email address and I will be more than happy to send it to them.
Peace, Love, Lamar,
Whitney
from Jim Klopman, friend of Lamar’s dad:
Last July, I nearly lost my son. During that time I often wondered what I would say at his funeral. What would I say at Lamar’s How had she affected my life?
Lamar’s smile: So many of our children today smile for the camera just to look good, to show off the thousands of dollars we parents have invested in their smile. I have tried to teach my kids that when they smile it has to come from the heart. A smile has love, happiness and joy. Every photo you see in this room today, Lamar’s smile is as authentic as any smile could be. You did not just see her smile, you felt it.
Years ago when Lamar was about five, we had her family and a couple of other family’s over for dinner. Tory, Mark, David and I were sitting outside getting ready to smoke a cigar. Unlit cigars laying about on the table.
Tory and I were discussing the merits of holding our kids back in first grade in order that our kids would be an older member of their grades. Tory was being his normal articulate, gracious self. I was being my typical strident slightly unpleasant self. It wasn’t long before I got the impression that Tory was planning to hold the 5 year old Lamar back.
As if almost on cue, Lamar shows up at our table, hops up into her dad’s lap, smiles that smile, picks up an unlit cigar very adeptly take a puff then…. takes the cigar, twirls it thru her fingers like I have never seen before nor seen since, smiles, takes another fake puff like an old pro. Puts the cigar down, looks up at her dad, smiles that smile, jumps down and joins the other kids. I swear to you that to this day I still try to twirl a cigar like that and can’t. There was no place in her 5 year old experience that she could learn how to do that. In my mind, she is an old soul and must have learned that in another lifetime.
How many five year olds, other than your own, do you know that have such a powerful long lasting impact on you. That’s Lamar. Don’t measure a life in the number of years lived, measure a life by the people affected by that life. In those terms, Lamar lived a full life.
I’m sorry she’s gone so soon. I am so privileged to have known her.
From Sally Hughey, Vestavia Hills, AL
Katherine Lamar Herring, such a beautiful girl on this earth. I was so blessed to have known her for most of my life. Lamar always had the biggest heart of any of my friends, and always could light up a room with her beauty and her smile and just all out love for everyone, including her enemies. Lamar never wanted to see anyone hurting, better yet just sad. If someone didn’t have a smile on their face, Lamar was sure to fix that. She was such a fun person to be around and always was the life of the party.
Every morning when I wake up, or just everyday in general I am constantly reminded by Lamar’s sweet smile and kind hearted spirit. I know that her spirit is with each and every one of us every single day and night. It is so great to know that I have such a beautiful guardian angel like Lamar watching over me and keeping me safe. I am so happy for her and I know she is singing with the angels and laughing at all of us being so torn apart about her not with us anymore. I will miss Lamar for as long as I live but I am so happy to know that she is in a safe place away from all this evil and pain that everyone has to deal with every day.
Please do not ever let Lamar out of your heart! She was such a great gift to everyone that knew her. Let her story be told and always remember the joy she has brought to so many people the past nineteen years. Keep all of her family and friends in your thoughts, for every day for the rest of their lives they are fighting the same battle. Thank you Dr. Herring and Mrs. Herring for letting me be a part of Lamar’s life for so long. Ya’ll raised an outstanding, gorgeous, loving, kind-hearted, caring and courageous daughter and I couldn’t thank you enough for such a great friend!
I love you more than you will ever know Lamar, and I am so thankful for such an amazing friendship I got to share with you! Your spirit will forever live in me! Be a star :)
You Left a Hole In My Heart And Its Shaped Like a Star” by Jenny Gee
You left a hole in my heart and its shaped like a star
it keeps me with you wherever I go
The star shines bright when I think of your laugh,
your smile, all that you were
You radiated light and love
Drew people close with your kindness and beauty
Your time here was short, but for a reason
God needed you as an angel in heaven
You left a hole in my heart and its shaped like a star
sometimes my star hurts when I think of the last time I saw you
I wish I could have said “I love you” one more time
given you one more hug
Then I remind myself you knew and I can
just not as soon as I would like
and my star shines again
I will learn from you to be a better friend, daughter, sister, partner
so your memory and star may shine through and touch everyone I meet
You left a hole in my heart and its shaped like a star
and I will carry it with me forever.
Sarah Swindle:
I still can’t believe this has happened. All the times we spent together… we’ve been friends since kindergarten. I remember when you wore your glasses and everyone made fun of you but I was there for you. I have so many pictures of us together and we were always together and having fun. Hiding from your grandmother under your bed and dining room table is one of the happiest moments of my childhood that I can remember. You were and still are a blessing to this world. My life is better because I knew you. You will always have a place in my heart… ever since kindergarten and forever more. You will always be my star mar. Can’t wait to see you someday and have a happy reunion. I will always love you.
Sydney Alana Fuller:
It’s taken me awhile to figure out what to say… I can’t say anything more than I wish it wasn’t you and I wish I would have taken more time with you the last time I saw you… I never in my life thought I would be going to a service for you. I wish I could have explained to you how I feel now about the things I’ve experienced over my life and what I’m realizing now with some people I know. I saw a lot of people today that care about you so much and I’m so glad I got to say goodbye the last time I saw you and I wish everyone had the chance to meet you. I was thinking last week when Griffin told me you were in his class that I should call you and see if you wanted to hang out and at this point, I wish I did. I talked to your family today and can’t imagine what they are going thru I will always keep you in my prayers and your family! Watch down over everyone I know you will! I will always remember your smile as long as I live.
