Much research has been done on the subject of trusting our instincts. Beyond that, here is our take on the importance of listening to our instincts.
Humans, like all animals, are equipped with basic response mechanisms. Often we recognize these as a parlor trick, “Look, I have goose bumps! That was so freaky!” Other times it is a primal fear, “The hair on the back of my neck stood up, I was so scared.” These are physical reactions, signs from our nervous system, recognition that there is something amiss. If you have butterflies in your stomach, you are nervous. If you have goose bumps, you are cold. If you have a dull ache in your belly around certain people, you are scared or worried. If you feel creeped out by a particular person, you should pay attention!
Our bodies are ever evolving, adapting. Details of circumstance change, but the big picture remains the same. The instinct that told us fire is dangerous, holds true today. You wouldn’t go in a burning house. The instinct that told us to RUN when we saw a bear in the woods still works today, only it’s a stranger in an alley. Who wouldn’t much rather look foolish for running through an alley when there was nothing to fear than lay on the ground wishing they had listened to the ache in their belly.
However, sometimes your gut betrays you. Sometimes, we choose to wear blinders, refusing to see the truth or deal with it. This is where our friends can see the danger that we can’t.
Kids in relationship are especially vulnerable as they are so in love that they can’t see beyond this emotion. In the beginning, we are excited by the newness of the relationship, as the excitement disappears, we are left with habits, of hanging out and calling, that are hard to break. We continue to hang out with someone because it has become comfortable and easy, for a while. A person might feel that there is no one else out there and the anxiety of being alone drives us to stay. What happens if our new friend has separated us from our old friends? Will they still love me? Will they accept me? How do I get away from this friend?
Kids between the ages of 12- 25 easily fall into traps laid by manipulators simply because of a lack of experince. These are the teaching moments. We are so busy enjoying the friendship, the relationship, the “ride,” that we don’t see the dangers.
